Relationship mediation provides the space and opportunity to re-establish quality connections between the two people who make up a couple.
What is relationship mediation?
There are difficult times in every relationship. Sometimes the clouds pass and the sun comes out, but there are situations that come back again and again, and it's hard to deal with them, it can feel like we're going round in the same circles over and over again. Mediation, constructive communication toolkithelps the parties to talk about what each needs to improve the relationship and what each can do to do so, instead of "who has done what wrong again". Attention, acceptance, quality time and forward-looking cooperation, joint plans and joint construction.
The process of relationship mediation
- The people concerned call the mediator individually by phone, where they can briefly explain the situation they are asking for help with. The mediator will ask questions to explore the communication and relationship between the parties and give detailed information about the mediation process.
- When both parties have spoken to the mediator on the phone, we will arrange a mutually convenient time for you to meet in person.
- At the end of the first session, we will discuss how to proceed. A mediation session lasts 2.5-3 hours and a full mediation process consists of 1-6 sessions. Although partial agreements are already reached in the first session, experience shows that it takes more time to develop a new kind of cooperation, and it is good to have a safe communication medium and a trained professional where this can happen under the right conditions. Any change can only be integrated into our lives with the right support.
- If an agreement is reached, we will put it in writing.
- Once the mediation process is over, the mediators will contact the parties a few weeks after the process has ended to see if they still need further support.
Since every mediation process is different, as every person and every relationship is different, we cannot predict how many sessions will be needed to achieve the desired change. One thing is for sure: if the participants are really motivated, there is a very high chance of finding mutually beneficial solutions.
Couples therapy or mediation?
- During the couples therapy process, the therapist aims to shed light on the past drivers of the participants' feelings and behaviours, based on the family patterns established by parents and grandparents, and then uses this information to help the parties to establish new foundations for cooperation in everyday life.
- In mediation, the role of the mediator is to build on the current needs and wants of the participants to create a mutually acceptable cooperation in everyday life, especially by rethinking communication patterns.
- While mediation can have therapeutic effects and emotional catharsis can be part of the process, the primary purpose of mediation is to the parties are able to articulate their own needs and wants and to listen to the needs of the other party, so that solutions based on mutual understanding can be found. We provide our clients with communication tools that, when applied to their own situations, can break the cycle of unproductive disputes.
How is relationship mediation different from relationship counselling?
In the process of mediation, the mediator does not give advice, does not take sides, does not take sides with either client, but takes sides with both: helping clients to articulate their needs and to listen to the other party's interests and needs, and to develop their own solutions based on them, as everyone is the best expert in their own life - if given the right tools.
What can I do if I want to come to mediation but my partner doesn't want to hear about it?
Even if the other party is not open to dialogue, you can do a lot to prevent communication between you from deteriorating. Conflict consultationWe will help you find your own resources and communication strategies tailored to the situation. Our methodological tools are based on constructive communication. After the conflict consultation, you can return to your everyday environment with a change plan and, if you wish, we will guide you through the change process, so you can consult our mediator colleague several times.
As a result of the consultation, you:
- You can see your own room for manoeuvre in a given case, so you can handle the situation more consciously
- Learn to recognise the current phases of a conflict and adapt your solutions accordingly
- You can reduce your stress because you can see more aspects from the outside
- Gain skills and practice in constructive communication tools, increasing your personal effectiveness by providing you with tools that can be adapted to other situations
- You're not alone as you look for solutions, and with expert support you can make changes more consistently in important situations.